Will I ever play like this

I was telling my teacher about the cereal aisle at Safeway 

But that one does have a beginning and an end, and what if it were infinite

And I have to choose a box of cereal, the colors and flavors, the promises of knowledge

And experiences shimmer in front of my eyes, I am paralyzed

By possibility, and so is this my way in life, in music, in French, in

Every step I take forward, or back, yet a paralysis of the boredom from 

The anguish of not/or/and choosing the right notes to go with that backing track.

I could not read his gaze but it scared me.

Oh, the cereal aisle - my daughter insists on GrapeNuts when she visits,

That will do or maybe, or maybe

Or maybe, oh, that one, 

As I dutifully wrote the three exercises for piano that I would dutifully execute

Every day, the Hanon finger exercises and then the CGC sequence in the left hand

At the same time and I won't allow myself that freedom/that curse to decide in each moment

What to do and my nervous system will thank me until I am stronger and 

Then I'll be able to walk some of the cereal aisle of life, feeling the strength of my legs,

The clarity of my eyesight and be secure in this dazzling life

Maybe for the first time.