The new president of the University

the new president
waves from his hospital bed
after an heroic act involving a stove hood
and his hand, still strong enough to greet his
new colleagues and adversaries alike.
he proclaims
the  mandatory suit will yield to a T-shirt, but it must be clean.
there will be no stadium seating for football fans
nor team building retreats in Hawaii for college personnel.
my goodness, all employees of the University will
work 8 to 5 for the good of the Institution, and
he now proclaims the end of all golden parachute
departures.
he is a revolutionary.