Quantify Mud, please

is it a 1% risk, tell me even though
you don't have the information you need,
I need it, I need that number, that certainty, here
in my blue suit and matching tie, my expert opinion
flown in from out-of-state, my expense account,  my
unlimited overhead hours to chat, think, discuss, read,
tell me,
justify the 1% risk in less than two hours analysis,
and make it snappy, we don't have time to do experiments
this year or next, there is no money for
such luxuries as data,
just the answer, please.